I’ve kept no secrets about how difficult the last year has been for me after a miscarriage, separation, and uncertainty of a marriage. And oh yes I am a severe codependent recovering from addiction with little idea how to love myself without external validation.
The reality of the human condition is this; pain is inevitable, suffering IS more avoidable. But no matter how much I read, write, pray, meditate, work a program, yadayada, the fact of the matter is I’ve had to process feelings. And sometimes, there is nothing to do but feel horrible or cry my face off. Before recovery, I would wake up dreading the actions of the night before. Now I wake up with a terrible lump in my throat like “Oh yeah, this is my reality today and it’s nothing like what I envisioned.” And yes I can write gratitude lists and tell myself it will get better, but there are very few things I have found to do in an instant that can shift my mood like being of service to others. One of the most amazing gifts of being in such prolonged emotional pain is the ridiculous amount of compassion you develop towards others. Being of service is the single most efficient way to get out of our own minds while positively impacting others. Is this not a total win/win??!! When people hear “service to others” they think volunteering at a shelter or donating clothes and food to a local center, but the truth is we can be of service over and over throughout our day, every day. So to jumpstart you in vibrating at a higher frequency tomorrow, I have started a very basic list of ways you can be of service to others, IMMEDIATELY:
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7/18/2016 11:30:53 pm
Hey Danielle! I've been thinking about you..... I came across this post and didn't realize what you have been going through in your personal life. We never know what's gonna hit us hard and we definitely don't know how we are gonna handle something like this until it actually happens. I don't know if we will ever be prepared for these sad and unforeseen circumstances for those of us in recovery. It's a lot easier for us to tell others how to grieve or handle stress. But when it comes to our own situations it a whole lot different. Thank you for your 10 steps to help deal with life on life's terms. You have always been very helpful to me. I am so very sorry for your loss and hope and pray everything will work out the way you would like. I will pray for you.
9/8/2016 01:49:20 pm
exactly what i needed to hear today, thank you
11/5/2016 02:42:08 am
These tips will really help all of us to cope with the most difficult period in our lives. It is quite difficult to overcome such a test with a smile on your face.
12/23/2016 05:32:57 am
Well, I think that some of your tips would work. I'll try them, as I'll get a need in them.
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about the master coach
Danielle, the Founder & Master Coach of RealYou Revolution, is a woman in long term recovery with a passion for helping others overcome their own personal demons – whatever they may be.